Yes, yes, the wheels of change move very slowly at C. Mariani Antiques, Restoration & Custom. In fact, at C. Mariani we often forget we're not IN the 18th century, we just sell furniture from then. By the way, is Eisenhower up for re-election? Because I haven't seen him in even one debate. And I like Ike, although I'm not too crazy about Dick.
Come to think of it, I LIKE Ike but I LOVE Mamie! How often do you get a First Lady with fashion sense AND a rare talent for movie-making?--what a gal! Little known factoid: without Mamie Eisenhower, there never would have been an "Auntie Mame!" Yep, that movie was not only based on Mamie's life but she also co-produced with Roz Russell (even Scorcese can't claim THAT).
Ok, that last paragraph was a total lie. Anyhow, where was I? Oh yeah, making excuses for not getting on 1st Dibs sooner.
It's just our "Old World", "Mañana is Soon Enough for Me" mentality. Some say that's being dim-witted, slow, or just "special" (in the bad sense). Shame on them! The haters. I prefer to think of our thought process as charming rather than tragic. Quirky rather than annoying. Retro rather than backward. But enough about me, let's talk about C. Mariani FINALLY joining 1st DIBS this week!
Why's this so great?! Because now you can shop for our antiques right online without ever having to visit our gallery. And that's good because our gallery is really intimidating, discriminating (not racially of course, just professionally), and our buildings (yes we have more than one) look like San Quentin from the outside.
Plus 99% of the folks that make it to our gates never get past them. Sad but true. It's not that we're anti-social, we're just short-staffed (i.e., me), and open to the trade by appointment only.
In other words we make it as hard as possible to get new customers. But no more! Each week on 1st Dibs, we'll be offering new and spectacular pieces from our collection of more than 5,000 extraordinary antiques:
So check 1st Dibs often and avoid the embarrassment of being turned away at our gates. Trust me, it's not pretty-before I worked here I couldn't get arrested in this town let alone make it past the receptionist at Mariani. But now, through the miracle of 1st Dibs technology, you can stroll right in, browse till you're stupid and buy the most exquisite antiques imaginable. Life is good, right? :)
P.S. Ok, fine. If you CAN get an appointment to visit (ask your interior designer or architect to set it up), it's so worth it: